


A Place In My Heart

by lezzerlee



Category: The Avengers (2012), Thor (2011)
Genre: Angst, Dubious Consent, Gags, Kissing, M/M, Non-Sexual Bondage, Post-Movie(s)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-14
Updated: 2012-05-14
Packaged: 2017-11-05 08:52:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,029
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/404550
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lezzerlee/pseuds/lezzerlee
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Thor wants what he used to have.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Place In My Heart

**Author's Note:**

> Post-movie with mild spoilers. Mentions past sexual relationship (could be interpreted as underage).
> 
> Originally posted at foxxcub's [Avengers Kissing Meme](http://foxxcub.livejournal.com/764068.html).

“Brother,” he whispered. Sharp blue-green eyes darted up to meet his pleading gaze. There was still fire behind them, the burning coals of anger and hatred and pain. Loki didn’t move against his bonds. He sat deathly still, shackled to the walls of his cell deep in the prisons of Asgard: a place haunting, cold, and bleak. 

Not a place for his brother, his brother who was so full of bright mischief and delight. The brother he remembered from his childhood playing harmless tricks, challenging him to games of cunning and wit. How he longed to laugh with him again, to see a smile from him that wasn’t filled with murder.

This man was not that brother. Thor looked into Loki’s eyes and saw the destruction held within them, felt his heart sag in his chest with the weight of his brother’s actions, at the cost of it all. Loki watched him warily, his gaze as sharp as a sword’s edge, challenging him.

Thor felt his resolve crumble. His only desire in the world was to unite his family once more, to give his mother back her wayward son, to urge his father to forgive Loki and for Loki to do the same. He wanted to feel whole again.

He entered the cell, approaching Loki cautiously, as if he were a feral cat, waiting to strike with claws outstretched, to peel his skin from bone.

“You may leave us,” he called to the guards. Without hesitation they stepped away. Thor waited until he could hear the heavy door shut behind them before stepping closer.

“Brother,” he repeated, and a sharp sliver of anguish ran through his heart to see his brother flinch at the word. “Brother, please, we can move past this.” A bitter glint flashed through Loki’s eyes, harsh words halted, trapped behind metal casing. 

“I never wanted this,” Thor said. His hand reached out without thought, to touch the join of cool metal to skin, thumb sweeping over Loki’s high cheekbone. “Do you not understand that I love you? That I always will?”

Sadness sank into Loki’s gaze. Thor imagined he could see regret, or something close to it. But Loki’s eyes lied just as well as his words. Still he wanted to believe them, what sorrow held in them, what love still left. 

His hand traced back along the gag, until his fingers were behind Loki’s head, nearly tangled into his messy black hair. They hovered over the latch, hesitant to release the barrier between them. He wasn’t sure if he wanted to hear more lies, or the truth.

With a deep breath, Thor undid the clasp anyway, letting the metal slide from Loki’s skin into his other hand. “Tell me brother,” he said as he stepped back. “Have you no place in your heart for me anymore?”

Loki’s bitterness warred with his desire, for the connection they had once shared. Thor could see his brows knit, warring with want and anger. “I fear I deserve no place in yours,” Loki said.

Thor stepped forward again. He took Loki’s face between his hands. “Please, brother. It can be as it once was. We can can have each other again.”

He kissed Loki desperately then, a consuming need to feel Loki’s mouth once more. He needed to remember what it was like when they were young, when nothing mattered more than the touch of hands over hot skin. When nothing felt more right in the world than Loki’s legs wrapped around him and and the ungentle nip of passionate kisses. Thor pressed his body close, feeling Loki’s chest breathing deeply against his own. He felt Loki respond to him, pressing forward, asking for more with a wicked tongue and small desperate moans. Thor struggled against the sense memory, wanting to grind against Loki’s lithe body, wanting to whisper every reassurance, every endearment he could think of into Loki’s neck, into his ear, into his heart. 

When Thor finally had to back away for air, Loki look bereft. He looked open and vulnerable, and so very young. Thor was kicked back to reality, out of his memories, back into the cell. The chains did not belong around his brother’s wrists. The cuts did not belong on his face. Thor remembered the pale stretch of Loki’s unblemished flesh in firelight and longed for those days again. 

And then Loki’s face hardened into steel. Thor could see the change as he rid himself of vulnerability, as he locked down his wants, his emotions, his fears.

Thor cupped his hand over Loki’s jaw and leaned in slowly, begging Loki with trembling hands and a desperate whisper. “You will always have a place in my heart,” he said, as he pressed a final chaste kiss to the side of Loki’s mouth. It was the only gesture he could think of to give. A tender kiss that he hoped would speak more than his words would ever be capable of. “I _am_ sorry,” Thor whispered. 

Loki looked at him and Thor could see their entire lives within that long moment. He could see all the mistakes he had made throughout. Then Loki sneered and laughed, throwing his head back to expose his neck.

“Oh brother, your sentiment is too much! You are _sorry?_ ” He shook his head, the light hollowing his eyes in shadow when he looked at Thor again. “I have no need for your apologies. I will have you kneel before me someday. That is the day you will be truly sorry.”

Thor’s heart clenched, and he felt nothing more than overwhelming sorrow, a pit hollow and ice cold in his chest. An acerbic resignation settled over him and he nodded and bowed his head. 

“I hope that you change your mind,” he said. His hope would never cease. With regret, he replaced the gag, latching it again. “I do love you, brother. I wish that could be enough for you.”

With the gag in place, Thor left, securing the cell door behind him. Every step away felt like despair, like that first moment when he’d lost Loki to the fracturing Bifröst. Every step away he was losing his brother again.


End file.
